Awful Truth #8: Cultural appropriation is not a crime, nor is it worth a single whine.
“The contrived taboo of so-called cultural appropriation means we can safely write only autobiography.”
Lionel Shriver, Abominations
“Hybridity is the very core of human civilisation.”
Olufemi Taiwo, Against Decolonisation
Cultural appropriation is one of the dumbest of the Woke’s many retarded crusades. It’s silliness on steroids—often accompanied by full-on roid rage. What is cultural appropriation? It is an action the Woke deem a grievous sin, whereby the sinner dares do something the Woke declare can only be done by someone of a specific identity category—and the miscreant is not of the that identify group. The identify is often race-based, but it can also be based on sexuality, religion (non-Western), handicap, or other category du jour.
The sin of cultural appropriation affords the Woke a wide range of opportunities for getting their panties in a knot. They erupt into childish hysterics about a person of the “wrong” identity (usually, but not always, a White person) who appropriates food, dress, hairstyle, clothing, art, music, movie or television roles, exercise, among other things.
Food? Exercise? Movie or television roles? How is that possible?
Oh, it be possible. A White person in Portland, Oregon, was attacked by the Woke for operating a Mexican food truck. During the 2020 Tokyo Summer Olympics, a wuss whined that surfing is appropriated by non-Hawaiians. Non-Indians who practice yoga—especially teaching it—are accused of co-opting another culture. Woke nitwits had a conniption fit that a Spaniard was cast to play Cuban-born Desi Arnaz in a movie. Only Injuns (casino type, not spelling bee ones) can wear war bonnets. Only Black folks can sport braids, dreadlocks, or afros (sorry, Bo Derek and Bob Ross). A non-handicapped person can’t play a wheelchair-bound character. Only homosexuals can play gay characters (does this mean that gay actors are now restricted to gay roles?). And on and on…and exasperatingly on.
As far as the Woke are concerned, nothing is off limits to being declared off limits. This nonsense ties into the Woke’s obsession with societal taxonomy. They create categories and assign inviolate expectations to each of these. Deviating from one’s pigeonhole, either in thought or deed, is verboten. A Black person mustn’t oppose affirmative action. A Hispanic person better not support enforcement of our immigration laws. A transperson who is against minors medically transitioning is a cursed apostate. How dare a White actor do a voice over of a non-White cartoon character.
What the Woke call cultural appropriation is actually freedom. The freedom to express yourself however you want. The audacity of individual freedom is something the Woke cannot abide. A glaring exception to their illogic is gender appropriation. A man can appropriate the female gender and literally become a woman by the mere declaration of “identifying” as one. According to the Woke, such a man is not merely a transwoman, but is indeed an actual woman capable of menstruation, lactation, and pregnancy. Not only is this appropriation allowed, but the Woke insist on its codification, with severe penalties for those reckless enough to dispute the assertion.
As is often the case with the Woke, decent folks are left terrorized as a result of little sins or things not a sin at all. The Internet readily enables this reign of terror, though I’m left wondering why these teapot tornados on the Internet aren’t either ignored or their sources told to fuck off. Telling the Woke to fuck off—in those exact words—would go a long way to making the world a better place. The trade-off of indecorous speech for freedom is a small price to pay. Conversely, agreeing to implement any of the tenets of the Woke’s demented ideology, including avoiding cultural appropriation, makes the world a far worse place.
This foolishness is further evidence that we are a nation of too many wussies. I don’t expect us to be wussy-free—that would be too much to wish for—but we need to tamp these numbers way down. This is epitomized by the Woke who whine about so-called cultural appropriation and those who cave into this madness and thus enable their ceaseless asshattery. Accusations of cultural appropriation are another of their tools used to divide us. The lazy media write stories about these incidents and make it seem that this is actually an issue of importance. It isn’t. It’s kindergarten-level playground antics, at best. A Woke acolyte (Susan Scafidi) even came up with a definition of cultural appropriation:
“Taking intellectual property, traditional knowledge, cultural expressions or artifacts from someone else’s culture without permission. This can include unauthorized use of another culture’s dance, dress, music, language, folklore, cuisine, traditional medicine, religious symbols, etc.”
The flaw in her pretentious definition is obvious. Who exactly is the person who grants the permission or determines unauthorized use? Do the Woke intend to form a tribunal tasked to make such rulings? This would be crazier than the issue itself. Don’t be surprised—because I won’t—that they actually try and criminalize it. Yes, a White lady making dim sum could go to jail. Likewise, a Mexican who makes sushi (I’ve personally seen these—and they do a hell of a good job!) or the Black woman wearing a blonde wig. Don’t worry about overcrowded prisons; the Woke are freeing real criminals to create plenty of room for thought miscreants.
This nonsense must stop. Too many calories are wasted on this profoundly inane cause. We must realize—and damn well accept—that no group is entitled to infallible politeness at all times or a copyright on its culture. There is no right that any group be spared snark, irreverence, mockery, rudeness, blasphemy, cultural appropriation, heresy, apostasy, disapproval, disrespect, or disagreement. It may seem counterintuitive, at first, but this is especially necessary in a diverse society; otherwise, we needlessly divert energy to that moment’s outrage du jour. The more diverse the society, the thicker its members’ skins must be. This is especially true in the Internet Age, where peccadillos are amplified grossly out of proportion and done so at the speed of light.
I can summarize my advice in regard to whining about cultural appropriation: Knock this shit off! I’ll appropriate what I want and so should you. Hereby, you have my permission to culturally appropriate whatever you want, whether it be out of respect or mockery or other motivation. Be free to make any food item, wear anything, sport any hairstyle, play any movie or television role (including voice overs), sing any song, write about anything.
What gives me the right to make this proclamation? Someone had to step up and do it for all our sakes. You’re welcome.
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